It’s super quiet in my house this morning.
There has been a big shift.
I could elaborate and talk about the last two years.
No I can’t and I won’t.
I want to put injury, illness and rehabilitation out of my mind and say,
Hell yeah!!!! We’re finally moving past this!
It’s inevitable. If you are living a human existence, experiences will come into your life and you will let them define you, even if it’s for just a little tiny moment. I wrote about the consequences of allowing others to create their identity of us in Mistaken Identity- Choose Yours, but we do the very same thing to ourselves that we see others doing to us when we cling to old stories and beliefs that we tell ourselves about the experiences that we have been through. When we use our situations to define us indefinitely we get stuck and become stagnant in growth.
Definition rather than development.
It’s super quiet in the house this morning because Ken has gone back to work following his hip surgery. For this really brief moment, I felt like I didn’t know what to do with myself. Truth be told, I really didn’t want to see him go back. Aside from the crappy parts of convalescing from a big surgery, having him here for coffee, and chats, and as a sounding board for business ideas has been awesome. And I really love him and spending time with him and creating cool things with him, too. Not even cheesey! Straight up truthspeak.
As I stand at this crossroads though, I wonder how different I will be without this past two years as my benchmark for normalcy. How will Ken be different? How about our relationship? What about our family?
What new things will we do now as this chapter in the McKee house has come to an end?
Man, I LOVE a good thought process.
New goals to set. New plans to make.
I haven’t had to do that in a big way for a long time.
There have been parts of our life together that have been in a real holding pattern as we have waited for things to be different.
I can’t decide if I want to laugh or cry.
It’s exciting and it’s scary all at once.
It’s a practice in surrender.
I’m reading Michael Singer’s book The Surrender Experiment and the ways that I have been able to use the information in that book already?? Wowza!!!
So that’s it. Today I am practicing surrendering to a new world for us. No goals or plans need to be made just yet.
When something draws to a close for you, do you look for something else to fill the space right away? Or do you sit in this delicious space of possibility to see and feel what has been changed for you before you jump into the next? Are you eager to want to create a next experience? Do you allow time to honor all the feelings, good and bad, that your experience has brought to you? Are you observant?
Being observant to the flow of life, and the experiences that show up, is something that Singer speaks about as being the best invitation for life to bring the right experiences to you and for you.
Today, I’m not going to go looking for something.
Today, I’m going to be the observer.
Practice being observant today. Even if you aren’t at the end of an experience. Even if you are smack dab in the center of it, gnarly and all. Practice observance and surrender and honoring of all of the feelings that come up for you.
Think development of self rather than definition of self.
When you, too, are on the other side of situation and experience, take some sacred time to honor what was brought to you before you jump to the next.